


The Life and Death of a Killer Octopus

by SilentWaves



Category: Assassination Classroom
Genre: Angst and Feels, Excerpts of their book mixed with their lives around it, Future Fic, Gen, Lots of Friendships Though, No Romance, Okajima is Okajima, Some Humor, There Are Some Experimental Styles, but it's mostly very lighthearted, they write a book
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-08-16
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:49:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,814
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25542382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentWaves/pseuds/SilentWaves
Summary: What defines a monster? The public sure as hell doesn’t know, because Koro-sensei is the furthest thing from a monster that 3-E has ever known. And because they were trained to face their problems head on, they decide their best course of action was to write and publish a book on that year.
Relationships: Class 3-E & Korosensei (Assassination Classroom)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 84
Collections: Assassination Classroom Big Bang 2020





	The Life and Death of a Killer Octopus

**Author's Note:**

> Here it is! My fic for the 2020 AssClass Big Bang hosted by [livixbobbiex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/livixbobbiex)! This work is honestly? Something that I'm really happy with even if I'm not really into assclass anymore. I liked being able to explore all of the characters on their own and hhh it was just a lot of fun to write. 
> 
> This fic does come with art by the brilliant **Keiaruu** ([Tumblr](https://keiaruu.tumblr.com/) | [DevientArt](https://www.deviantart.com/keihoshi)) so please please take the time to send some love their way!

“It’s been five years since the Moon Incident and the subsequent school year where the monster responsible forced a class of misguided students to listen to his teachings,” Nagisa rips the news article after reading it aloud. “What the fuck is this? I thought we clarified everything already?”

“They dismissed our story because we were kids and they don’t want to admit that a ‘big scary monster’ could actually be a good person,” Karma shrugs, or at least as much as he can while laying down on the couch. “Nothing new.”

“Well we’re not kids anymore, are we?” Rio walks into the living room now that her bagel was done toasting. “They should’ve gotten a better idea by now, since our side of the story hasn’t changed even once every time they asked.”

“We should just… I don’t know. Talk to them somehow.” Minami looks up from her textbook. They all rented out a Tokyo apartment together since it was decently close to the university, the one which Karma, Nagisa, and Minami all got into. Rio picked up some freelance work so she can live anywhere that isn’t some shady street corner, and Kayano gets enough money to take the train to her filming sites wherever she’s not getting chauffeured. 

“How?” Kayano sighs. “Whenever I mention it in interviews, they always edit it out, and whenever I mention it on socials people always assume that I’m lying for media exposure.”

“We know, you always bring it up,” Rio massages her temples, her words more sympathetic than chastising. “But I just feel so shitty moving on with life when Koro-sensei’s getting that kind of rep.”

“He doesn’t deserve it!” Nagisa rarely gets worked up, but when he does it tends to send him pacing around the apartment with large hand gestures and nearly pacing a groove into the floor. “And the reporters weren’t even there, what kind of right do they have to tell his story?” He knocks over a plate, and doesn’t notice. He manages to avoid stepping on the shards anyways. “It’s bullshit, is what it is. They don’t know anything about that wonderful feeling of clear bloodlust, of charging towards someone with the full intent to kill them with honour! If I wasn’t so worried about a criminal record, I’d go right over and—”

“No Nagisa, we all know you wouldn’t actually threaten anyone that much weaker than you.” Rio says, gesturing towards the shattered plate for Nagisa to clean up. “You’re paying for that by the way.”

“I know,” Nagisa runs his hand through his hair. He’s glad that he can do that now, since it’s short enough that it doesn’t get too messed up. “But I would just — _ugh_ — I could take down a group of trained soldiers twice my size, but I can’t defend the perception of the most important person in my life?”

“Yeah, it’s frustrating,” Kayano pats Nagisa’s shoulder sympathetically. “But unless you want to take over the news, or, I don’t know, manage to brainwash the majority of the population…”

“I could make some kind of sedative,” Minami says, “Maybe there’d be a way to add a hypnotic aspect to—”

“What? No!” Kayano interrupts. “That was obviously a joke, Mina-chan.”

“Yeah, but it _could_ happen,” Minami raises a teasing eyebrow. “I could do it.”

“I have no doubt that you can,” Kayano says. “That’s exactly what I’m worried about.”

“Yeah, I think that’s exactly the kind of thing that Koro-sensei would disapprove of,” Nagisa crosses his arms.

“Ugh, you guys are no fun,” Minami sticks out her tongue. 

“Oh,” Karma, whom everyone thought was sleeping, speaks up. “Got it.”

“Got what?” Rio walks over, brushing the bagel crumbs off her lap. “You didn’t beat my Candy Crush record, did you?”

“Ahah, that too.” He quickly continues talking before Rio could protest. “But look,” he holds up his phone. “We could write a book.”

“A book?” Nagisa asks. “You mean _Rio_ could write a book? No offence you guys, but other than her we’re either a) too busy or b) absolute garbage at writing.”

“What would the book even be about?” Rio frowns. “I can _write_ but this kind of thing really needs to include everyone’s stories, y’know?”

“Yeah, we all had different experiences throughout the year. Rio’s a good writer, but it’s not like she can live twenty-something different lives.” Minami says.

“Well, no. Listen,” Karma hesitates for a second, gathering his thoughts. “What if we all just write, like, an excerpt or something. For people like Terasaka, he can just get someone else to write it for him, since his reading/writing level is the same as a first-grader’s.”

“I’m telling him you said that,” Kayano says. 

“You see him on a regular basis?” Karma asks, incredulous.

“No, but phones exist.” Kayano holds up her mobile (of course, she’s the type of person to pick out the latest model). “Hey Ritsu, you there?”

“Hey Kayano!” Ritsu’s perky voice rings out from the speaker as her icon appears on the screen. “You haven’t talked to me in like, two days. That’s _so long,_ you know?”

“I’ve been busy!” Kayano laughs. She continues chatting with Ritsu as Nagisa turns back to Karma.

“So what makes you think a book would work?” Nagisa asks.

“Well, it wouldn’t do any harm.” Karma shrugs. “Though actually, I really want to make sure that certain people aren’t allowed to write anything.” He snaps his fingers as an idea comes to mind. “I’ll just edit them then, and we can compile everybody’s stories as some kind of collection.”

“Like an anthology?” Rio asks.

“Yeah, but like, in memoir form.” Karma answers.

“But I don’t trust you, Karma,” Minami jokes. “You definitely can’t be the only one editing, I’ll count myself in too.”

“Cool,” Karma turns to Nagisa. “Teacher’s pet, you in?”

“Ugh, I’m about to _become_ a teacher, you’ve got to drop that nickname eventually,” Nagisa rolls his eyes good-naturedly. “And you know what? I trust 3-E much more than I trust the news to tell Koro-sensei’s story.”

“What about publishing costs? Promotion? Hell, cover art can cost up to hundreds of dollars, not to even get started on professional editing rates.” Rio sits down next to Karma, swatting his legs to get him to move. 

“I can help!” Ritsu chimes in.

“Ooh, are we doing a heist?” Kayano asks.

“Kayano, you’re rich, you don’t need heists.” Minami deadpans.

“Well I _would_ be rich if I wasn’t shelling my funds on this apartment for you guys.”

“The majority of your funds go into pudding and you know it,” Rio laughs.

“Ugh, whatever,” Kayano blows a raspberry. “Anyways, Ritsu said she has a solution.”

“Yes, you know the 10 billion yen reward?” Ritsu asks. 

“We spent it all on the mountain, didn’t we?” Nagisa asks.

“Well, sort of! We had about a million left over, and I invested that into a savings account for you guys!” Ritsu says. “I didn’t want to tell you — sorry — because otherwise you guys would be all weird about splitting it, or you’d spend it on curtains for the class or something. But there’s a lot there now, and since this is a cause for all of us, then I think it’s a good time to use it!”

“We’d have to get the rest of the class on board first though,” Minami says. “I know some people have really gone on to do some stuff with their lives, so it’s not like they would have the time to write a whole thing for a book right now.”

“Can’t we just have this be a long-term project?” Kayano asks.

“The hype around the story might die down then,” Rio points out. “It’s only popular right now because it’s the five year anniversary. Who knows if they’ll even do something for the ten-year one?”

“Yeah, I’d say that this is something that needs to be done as soon as possible,” Nagisa nods. “Without being rushed, of course.”

“And we’re not letting Terasaka write a single word, right?” Karma says it like a statement. 

“I sent a message to everyone, and so far 22 people have agreed! I’m just waiting on the remaining few now,” Ritsu says. “Oh, and they were wondering if anyone could double up! For example, Okano will be away on a training camp and she’s worried that there won’t be enough time for her to write, so Meg is taking over her section.”

“I don’t see any problems with that,” Karma nods. “Hazama can write for her gang.”

“And hopefully Okajima doesn’t get too carried away.” Nagisa sighs.

“Dang, thinking back on it, I don’t we would’ve become friends with most of the people in that class if we weren’t all dragged into that situation.” Kayano says.

“You’re like, the only person who voluntarily went,” Minami teases.

“Well yeah, but I was dragged into the _situation_ , you know?” Kayano pouts. “It counts!”

“Yeah yeah,” Rio smiles. “Anyways, I want to note that if we don’t want this to plop, we need to get some really fast and cheap promotion.”

“We have famous friends,” Karma nods at Kayano. “I think that might be easiest part of this whole idea.”

“Hm. Point,” Rio scrolls through the names in the 3-E group chat. “Kurahashi has a youtube, Hara has a restaurant, Sugaya has his freelance work and socials, Kayano obviously, and I think Maehara recently started a podcast as a side hustle for his acting career? Did I miss anyone?”

“Is Meg still going to the Olympics this year? I know Okano is taking a break from competitions because of that injury, but I think Meg is fine, right?” Nagisa asks. 

“Yup, she is! But she’s outdated and doesn’t have any socials,” Ritsu laughs. “And she doesn’t plan on starting any either.”

“That’s fine.” Karma says. “We have plenty of famous people to brainwash — er, _encourage_ their fans into giving us money.”

“Ugh, you’re so rude,” Rio scoffs good-naturedly and turns to her phone. “Ritsu, do you mind connecting me to them if they’ve already responded?”

“Got it!” 

Ritsu and Rio walk to a quieter room to talk about promotional materials while Kayano looks at Nagisa with a puzzled expression. 

“So we’re really doing this?” Kayano asks. 

“What, scared we’ll all be famous and then you’ll be left in the dust?” Karma grins.

“No!” Kayano lightly punches him in the shoulder. “I just mean, our class was chaotic and messy even when we were all working closely together. That’s why we only had, like, two combined assassination attempts.”

“Well, we all want to clear Koro-sensei’s name, so I think that’s reason enough for us to try to organize ourselves!” Minami counters. “I think that if there’s anything unifying us — well, it’s the _only_ thing unifying most of us — it’s the truth about Koro-sensei!”

“Fair,” Kayano nods. “Well then, should I start writing?”

“Yeah,” Nagisa smiles. “This’ll be fun!”

* * *

_Transcript by Hiroto Maehara. Any notes are in [brackets]_

Maehara: Welcome back everyone! I’m doing a bit of a different episode today since I have an important announcement to make. I’m joined by my former classmates Kanzaki, Sugino, Hayami, and Chiba, and with the trending twitter tags, I think you can already guess what’s happening if we’re discussing old classes! [paper rustles]

Kanzaki: Hello, I’m Yukiko Kanzaki. I work at an office during the day, and I like to make some rounds around the arcades after hours.

Sugino: Hey! Y’all probably know me already if you’ve been keeping up with recent sports news the past few years. 

Hayami: How are the Tigers this season?

Sugino: We’re doing great! Our fanbase is amazing [he sounds like he’s blowing a kiss here?] and my team’s allowing me to take the day off for this podcast since we’ve just finished a pretty hard series.

Maehara: [laughs] Sugino, I’m sure very little of my audience understands baseball, but thank you anyways. And Hayami, please introduce yourself.

Hayami: I’m Rinka Hayami, I manage a shooting range.

Maehara: You know what? That’s on me for getting the shy one onto this podcast. Chiba?

Chiba: I’m Ryunosuke Chiba. I own an architectural firm and that’s all I guess? [laughs] I don’t really have much going on anymore. 

Maehara: Well, any life seems dull after that year that we’ve had. So, let’s get to the juicy stuff. I have a few questions here that I want to ask you guys, but feel free to go on tangents and the like. It _probably_ won’t go on any longer than 45 minutes.

Sugino: Uh, wait. We’re here about the book, right?

Kanzaku: That is what he said in the email, yes.

Maehara: Yup! I mentioned it a bit on Twitter already to get some fan questions. But honestly? By this point, anytime someone mentions something about past classroom excitement, it’s already assumed to be about the moon incident and the “monster” teacher that came out of it.

Chiba: Nice. Wha—Hayami, you can’t just nod on a podcast. It’s an audio medium.

Hayami: I know that, I was just being polite by doing a response[she scoffs, I think? Still as tsundere as ever…]

Kanzaki: Oh? Why wasn’t I invited to the wedding? [laughter]

Chiba: Ah, no, we’re not— 

Hayami: I’m at his house because we’re neighbours and he has better wifi.

Sugino: Mood.

Maehara: Anyways, I’d like to get you guys started on our first question, which was actually submitted by a fan on Twitter, so thanks! [throat clearing] So, _I heard that you guys needed to actually kill your teacher. Was that an actual thing that was forced onto you, or was something else happening there?_

Sugino: Ah, that’s a pretty good one to start off on.

Chiba: Well, we were offered 10 billion yen, first off. 

Kanzaki: And I don’t think I was the only one to think of it as an opportunity to let out some frustrations towards school.

Sugino: [makes an adorable ‘eep’ sound] Kanzaki! I don’t think you should admit that murder is stress relief for you!

Kanzaki: Well, it’s not _anymore_.

Hayami: Ominous.

Chiba: Agreed.

Maehara: But it’s kinda true, isn’t it? I mean, what with all the bullying and harassment that we were dealing with, and no outlet since Terasaka would lose his [censored] if anyone tried to take the title of “class bully” from him.

Hayami: Yes, maybe it was originally something of a relief, being able to attack with no holds barred towards a teacher, since none of us have good experiences with them before Koro-sensei.

Kanzaki: Yeah, but after that, I think our bloodlust faded into something a lot more playful. We used our killing attempts to bond with Koro-sensei, and it was a goal for us to drive towards wholeheartedly. 

Chiba: I was one of the snipers, along with Hayami, and it was just really… fulfilling, to have a single target to aim for, but also with the knowledge that we’d never quite get him. I mean, until we did.

Sugino: It was like, fun, light-hearted casual attempts at murder. And _wow,_ that sounds like a horrible thing to say, but hear us out. Please.

Kanzaki: I could honestly say that we never expected any of our attempts to work. We’d have liked to hit a few tentacles, or maybe we would’ve felt incredibly happy if we managed to shoot his head off. But we never wanted to _kill_ him.

Chiba: Yeah, with the system that we got, killing him was the objective, and we had to do whatever necessary to accomplish it. That being said, I’m sure none of us wanted him gone. That’s what it was, a very childish and naive way of thinking that we could kill him without losing him.

Hayami: I don’t think it was childish. Sure, it’s unrealistic, but it’s not a bad thing to want someone as lovely as Koro-sensei to stay with us forever, or at least for the rest of his natural lifespan.

Sugino: Aw, Hayami.

Kanzaki: But don’t you feel the same?

Sugino: Of course! I totally agree, and in the end we only really killed him because the government wouldn’t get off our [censored] about it.

Maehara: Oh man, do you guys remember our class civil war? That’s what I was trying to think of, I remember us being so against the idea of killing him, but also against the idea of disrespecting his intentions.

Kanzaki: To explain, there was a chance that he wouldn’t explode — er, that was what caused the damage in the moon, by the way, some rats from the same experiment exploded there — if we left him alive. However, if we stopped our efforts to kill him, then we felt that we’d be disrespecting both our and his efforts thus far.

Chiba: Yeah, I think someone mentioned earlier that our killing attempts were the best way to learn, and the best way for us to bond with Koro-sensei. We wouldn’t accept underhanded or cheap methods, because he cares, sorry, _cared_ , for us just as much as we care for him.

Hayami: Mmhm. Without the killer-and-target relationship, Koro-sensei wouldn’t be a tenth of the teacher that he was.

Sugino: [laughs. Well, it’s more of a giggle, really] Yeah, he’d use himself as bait for us when tests were coming up, because he wanted us to be motivated to score higher.

Kanzaki: He really was an idiot, wasn’t he? [she sighs] A round, slimy idiot who loved too much for his own good.

Chiba: He cared more than most other people in our lives, at the time when we needed it the most. He knew what we needed, and he did his best to make it happen. 

Hayami: All the more of a tragedy that he's gone now. 

Sugino: Yeah. 

[about five seconds of awkward silence was cut out for you guys]

Maehara: Alright, so next question then?

Kanzaki: Sure.

Maehara: [clears throat] Alright, this one is because Rio told me to talk about it. _Why should we care about you guys writing this story? Didn’t we already read about it all in the news? Also, didn’t it all happen like five years ago? Why make something now?_

Hayami: Nobody would care about a book written by teenagers. 

Chiba: Which is unfortunate, but true. Besides, we didn’t really have time to research book publication when we were too busy focusing on an assassination.

Sugino: Yeah! And besides, anyone who trusts whatever the news tells them is… not it.

Maehasa: Hey Sugino, don’t be rude! [laughter] They’re just misinformed.

Sugino: Sorry!

Hayami: Mmhm. Like the Principal Asano situation.

Chiba: Yeah, that was a whole thing, wasn’t it?

Kanzaki: I would say it’s a lot more than that. Still not sure how the full truth about Kunugigaoka never came out.

Sugino: They talked about like… the system, and a bit of bullying if I remember right? They didn’t even cover half of it. 

Maehara: Yeah, I could probably pull up some stuff, but the news on everything died down surprisingly fast for the scale of the incident.

Sugino: [mutters something that’s too quiet to make out]

Chiba: Huh?

Sugino: I _said_ , that it was probably Asano who paid them off.

Maehara: Oof. Yeah, I won’t get too political, but Asano’s a piece of garbage. 

Kanzaki: I can’t hate him though, since he became rather good friends with Koro-sensei by the end of that school year.

Hayami: Really? 

Kanzaki: Well, you know, it’s not like he’s a good person or anything, and honestly I would be a lot happier if he was in jail, but it’s not like I’m losing sleep over him.

Chiba: Hm.

Kanzaki: No really! I just think that… you know, to some extent… we kind of owe him? If it wasn’t for that [censored] system, we would’ve never ended up in Class E, and we never would’ve had Koro-sensei as a teacher. 

Sugino: I mean, yeah? But we’ve literally walked home with a limp before because of how badly the main building students would harass us.

Kanzaki: Of course, no. I agree with that, but I don’t think that we should hate him completely. He… well, I’m never going to forgive Principal Asano, and I don’t care about whatever stuff he went through in the past because that doesn’t excuse anything… but he did play an important role in that whole experience.

Hayami: …Fair.

Chiba: I think we can agree to disagree. I don’t care if Asano was the one to put us into the classroom, or created the system that put us there — whatever. I can’t forgive him for everything just because he became a slightly decent human being by the end of the school year and started being friendly-ish towards Koro-sensei. 

Sugino: Yeah, what he said!

Kanzaki: No, I agree. I’ll agree that our views are different, and that’s alright. Oh, just please know that I’m not defending him or justifying his behaviour in any way, I just think that for me, I’d like to respect whatever aspects of Koro-sensei’s memory that I can… even if they’re pieces of garbage.

Hayami: Of course.

Maehara: So, back to the question: what would you tell anyone from the audience who doesn’t know why they should buy this story?

Sugino: Because it was a [censored] cool story! We got assassination training and learned arithmetic from a monster who supposedly destroyed the moon!

Kanzaki: There’s also a lesson about growing up and adult responsibility in there, but yes, that too.

Hayami: Also, media sensationalization and how society neglects those whom they decide aren’t worth it. 

Chiba: And don’t forget about how the government forced the responsibility of multiple international militaries onto a single class of teenagers. 

Maehara: …Yeah, there’s a lot in there. I think it’s very important to note that we didn’t make anything up at all — you can literally fact check us whenever you want. 

Sugino: Yup. Not a single thing was stretched or lied about! I don’t think there’s any reason for people to suspect us either, since we’re apparently all “suffering from Stockholm Syndrome” which, we’re not, and this book is our proof!

Hayami: I considered it for a bit, actually.

Chiba: What, whether we were manipulated?? I don’t think… 

Hayami: Well, we were impressionable children in a [censored] situation. It wouldn’t be too far-stretched to think that we were under certain false impressions after all the harassment from everyone else.

Sugino: Did you… Did you come up with, er, _um?_

Hayami: Not at all. I thought back to everything that occurred that year a few months back, when I was certain that it was long enough that I could view my memories through an objective lens. He never did anything distasteful or manipulative. And besides, we were 15, not stupid. At that age there wasn’t much he could do that we wouldn’t notice. Maybe we latched on to him a bit as the parental figure that most of us didn’t have, but we never had to make excuses for his behaviour, and he never did anything to warrant that in the first place. 

Sugino: So. Objectively, we’re in the clear?

Hayami: I don’t know, I’m not a psychology expert, but I would like anyone listening to please know that we weren’t groomed or ‘trained’ in any way to sympathize with Koro-sensei. He was a good person, and we loved him as a father because of it. That’s all there is to it.

Maehara: Oh wow, Hayami, I didn’t know you would have that much to say! I mean, thank you, obviously, but dang. You never talked this much during our class reunions.

Hayami: Mmhm. Probably because there’s usually not much I want to say to you.

Kanzaki: [laughter] I can almost hear the shock on Maehara’s face. Oh yeah, I’ve been meaning to ask, but are you still flirting around?

Maehara: Wha—I would never— 

Kanzaki: You’re not very subtle, you know. [she’s probably grinning, it’s very implied through her tone] It’ll get you in trouble someday if you get involved with some big name politician’s wife.

Maehara: I don’t—this is irrelevant.

Sugino: [laughing, like the traitor that he is] You better not edit that out Maehara. 

Maehara: I’ll… sure, whatever. Expose me to my very trusting audience.

Chiba: I think they already know that you’re an incorrigible playboy. 

Maehara: Ok ok next question!! [everyone else is laughing. So rude >:(] _Has writing this book helped you guys to process everything that happened?_ and that’s from my discord server. [$2 tier in my Patreon to join up ;)]

Kanzaki: Um, I don’t think so? It was a rush, certainly.

Sugino: Yeah, a year’s pretty short when you look back on it.

Kanzaki: Especially since it was just a school year, and not even a full one.

Maehara: Yeah.

Kanzaki: So I honestly think that because everything was so fast paced, everything kind of became the “new normal” really quickly. 

Hayami: I think that the initial shock died down fairly quickly after the first week.

Sugino: At the very longest, by the end of the first month.

Chiba: And even then, we had adjusted pretty quickly to our new schedules. It was much less mundane than our typical school lives before that. 

Kanzaki: We no longer dreaded going to school everyday, so the excitement kind of took over the shock pretty quickly.

Maehara: Yeah. Alright, so next question: _Have you guys done anything to celebrate the release of this book?_ That one’s from me. I’m wondering if you guys wanted to hang out again. [laughter]

Sugino: Pfft, sure. I was thinking about getting another trip to McDonald’s, but I think we’re still banned after what happened last time.

Kanzaki: Karma _really_ didn’t need to do that… but at least we got some good footage out of it.

Chiba: Kickstarter stretch goal?

Maehara: We aren’t launching a Kickstarter [oof, yeah ok I was going edit out that snort but everyone told me not to :(( ]

Chiba: Preorder stretch goal then [probably holding back laughter]

Kanzaki: I thought the preorder stretch goal was the merch.

Chiba: Merch and footage.

Sugino: You just want to see the footage! [probably sticking his tongue out. He’s just that kinda guy] Karma isn’t going to share it though, since you missed it. 

Chiba: I was sick for that reunion! If I had known that you guys got something that hilarious to happen then I would’ve showed up!

Maehara: With your gross stuffy nose? Nasty.

Chiba: [pouting. no, _yes_ , Chiba, you were pouting] I would’ve worn a mask or something.

Kanzaki: [laughs] Alright, what about you, Hayami?

Hayami: …I went to visit his grave recently.

Sugino: Woah. How… how did that go?

Hayami: It was alright. I like to think that his spirit maybe comes back sometimes. It’s, well, it’s kind of crazy and stuff, but there’s no harm in hoping that he comes to check up on us. You know that it was raining everywhere on that day except that spot on the mountain? [she sighs] I like to think that he was listening.

Chiba: What did, you know, if you want to share, but what did you talk about?

Hayami: I talked about the book, how we want to clear up his public image and give everyone the full story. I wanted… I don’t know. I just think he deserves to know.

Kanzaki: That’s lovely, Hayami. And?

Hayami: I don’t know. There’s not much I can tell from a convenience in the weather. I did feel better afterwards though.

Chiba: Hm. That’s good. 

Sugino: Well, I wouldn’t believe that Koro-sensei would ever stop us from doing anything, especially if it makes us happy.

Maehara: Yeah, he would probably do that flustered thing that he does where he’ll be really happy and just tries to hide it. 

Sugino: Haha, yeah… 

Chiba: You know, it never really registered how much I’d miss him until about a year after all that.

Kanzaki: Yeah?

Chiba: Well I wanted to go see him, tell him I survived my first year in high school. I wanted to catch up and tease him and hear his stories and — sorry. 

Hayami: No need to apologize.

Chiba: I just wanted to hear his voice again. It’s stupidly high-pitched for his size and he uses way too many inflections but… It really sank in that time, you know?

Sugino: Yeah.

Maehara: I guess I had a moment like that too, when I moved out and I realized that my dad wasn’t half the parent that Koro-sensei was.

Sugino: In my first professional game, I guess I half-expected to see him in the stands somehow.

Hayami: I once dreamt about his death, and I couldn’t sleep for a week afterwards.

Kanzaki: I beat up some people who were talking [censored] about him once. Got a charge but nothing serious. 

Sugino: Damn. You were alright though?

Kanzaki: Yeah no worries! 

Chiba: Sorry, I guess I kinda brought down the mood a bit there. 

Maehara: No worries, I’m glad you guys felt comfortable enough to share. Do we want to move on to the next question or…? 

Kanzaki: Sure.

Maehara: [rustles papers] Oh, uh. Well, that actually covers most of everything that we’re allowed to talk about. I think the other questions are already covered in the book, so if we didn’t answer anything it’s because we wrote about it already!

Chiba: Thanks for inviting me.

Hayami: Me too.

Kanzaki: Mmhm, we need to arrange another reunion soon.

Sugino: And don’t forget to support us by getting the book! Coming out on April 7, and preorders are open already. If you want merch (we do!!) then please consider ordering!

Maehara: Hey, that’s my line! [laughter] Anyways, I hope that you all got an idea of just how misconstrued the news was, and that you’ll find some interest in discovering our side of the story! Good night everyone.

* * *

**(NEW ARTICLE) 5-YEAR ANNIVERSARY INTERVIEW WITH A MEMBER OF THE INFAMOUS CLASS 3-E FROM THE MOON INCIDENT! CLICK HERE TO READ**  
WRITTEN BY: Sakae Hattori, INTERVIEWING: Taiga Okajima

.  
.  
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_Due to unforeseen circumstances and an excess of censorship of course language, this article had to be removed indefinitely._

* * *

####  **Chapter 19**

_Written by: Meg Kataoka_

Hi all! I’m sure you know me as the Meg Kataoka the olympic swimmer, but I’ll be writing to you today from a bit of a different perspective. I’m sure you’ve all heard that I was a part of that infamous moon-incident a few years back as one of the students assigned under the tutelage of the monster Koro-sensei. What you might not know is that I owe my success to that very same teacher. I’m writing today to tell you about how learning to kill someone is what gave me the skills I needed to get good enough to join the olympics at 17 years old.

 **Side note:** I’ll also be including the experiences of my good friend and former classmate Okano Hinata, who is currently away at a training camp in Moscow and is thus unavailable to write her own segment.

I guess I should start with a typical day in the classroom. If you manage to ignore our daily attempts of murder, and the speed of personalized learning that Koro-sensei set up for us, then there really wasn’t anything outstanding about our learning environment. As you may know, his speed went upwards of Mach 20, meaning that he could go twenty times faster than the speed of sound. This meant that he could make ‘copies’ of himself around the classroom, one Koro-sensei for each student, and tailor our education to our needs.

I’ve never done particularly _badly_ in school, per say, but I did get overwhelmed by competitive swimming and I ended up neglecting my studies, hence how I ended up in Class 3-E in the first place. Well, that wasn’t the whole story, but any other disturbances only became problems because I was so focused on my sport. I had to give up on swimming when I entered 3-E, because I was hearing from practically everyone in my life that I couldn’t find a stable future in it — my parents stopped paying for my tech suits, my teachers stopped allowing late submissions, and my friends all abandoned the person who would undoubtedly end up in the E-for-End-class. 

I tried to pay more attention, I really did, but I didn’t realize how much I’d miss the water until I couldn’t go for swims anymore. I had to quit the school swim team, and I had to quit the competitive team that I swam for outside of school. After I left the sport so suddenly, I became a bit more downtrodden then usual. I might’ve even gone through a period of depression, though I won’t claim anything as I wasn’t sent to a therapist at the time to confirm anything. 

This is getting a bit heavy. The point that I’m trying to get at here is that the water meant everything to me. I would’ve given just about anything to be back for just one more swim, regardless of how bad my form would be or how slow I went. I really, really missed the water, and because of it I couldn’t really focus on something as uninteresting as calculus or chemical titrations. There was no getting back into swimming until my grades got back up, and there was no getting my grades back up until I got back into swimming. There was no chance of winning at all, and to top it all off I had classmates asking me to help them with their problems with no consideration for me, and with no more after-school obligations to attend I had no more excuses. 

Unsurprisingly, I ended up right in the E-class that I had dreaded so much. It wasn’t the lack of status or the bullying from my schoolmates that I feared, but instead the reality that I would never be able to swim again until I got back into the main building. 

We could talk about the toxicity of the system, and how bad it was for us, but that’s a topic for another story. This one is about the teacher who saved us from a hell that we thought to be inescapable, and how he transformed it into our own little paradise.

I was fortunate to have parents who decently cared about me. Swimming is expensive, after all, and although they were rather distant they were rich enough to not mind paying the fees. Koro-sensei wasn’t that. He was so poor that he was scraping coins from underneath vending machines, so poor that he would be first in line and fast enough to snatch the best bargain deals. Regardless, it became pretty obvious that the weight of his wallet had nothing to do with the capacity of his heart. He made a pool for us — for _me_ — right on the mountain which used to seem so daunting. It became something that I looked forwards to everyday, staying behind after school to do laps with Koro-sensei as a timer and coach (though he wasn’t any good at it, and mostly just cheered). 

Now, I will say that the months away from the sport had made me quite rusty. It’s no secret that the key to improvement in any sport is to practice every day, and I obviously missed a very large window of opportunity. But, and I hesitate to say this, the fitness provided by the assassination attempts helped. Whatever weight I had gained from my adjustment to life without swimming had been lost as soon as we learned how to climb trees. My upper body strength improved vastly, and when I could only do about five pull-ups even at the peak of my former training, I soon became able to easily push 20 or even 30 as time went on throughout that year. The hour-long climb to our classroom in the mountains strengthened my calves and my thighs, and before I knew it I could push :30s in my 50m kick sets when I could barely do :40s before.

Okano, as a gymnast, benefitted even more. I’m sure we’ve all watched as she swung around those double bars like she weighs nothing, like she’s grown wings and made the air her home, because that’s exactly what she’s been learning to do throughout that year. We needed to swing through trees without making a sound in order to sneak up on our target, and we needed to hold ourselves still in suspended corners (leading to very cramped core and back muscles the next day!) in order to remain as undetectable as possible. Okano’s feats on the bars are downright _professional_ , and sure, probably because she is now, but that’s irrelevant. Her skills didn’t come from the limited training that we get in posh centers or expensive gyms. Her skills came from a year of learning in an unfamiliar environment, led by an unfamiliar teacher. That’s why her routines look so weightless, and so assured. 

My skills, on the other hand, weren’t so much improved physically as they were mentally. Sure, I was much more fit than before, and I had strength in areas that were previously my weak spots, but I could’ve easily gained that strength at a gym if I had the time. No — swimming, like most sports, are more of a mental hurdle. Okuda tells me that during our time in E-class, she still had the time to swing through trees as she walked home, or found the time to do stretches while studying, whereas I wasn’t able to get into the water at all unless I was taking a bath. I don’t say this to dismiss her struggles in any way. In fact, if she was free to write her story I’m sure she would mention some personal anecdotes that I don’t feel at liberty to assume nor disclose. But regardless, the fact remains that I was in a very bad place mentally and emotionally because of the absence of something that I loved over most other things in life. And it was Koro-sensei who not only gave me a pool to swim in, but a place where I felt secure enough to do so. His teaching was so effective that I could afford to spend my free time doing something I loved instead of studying for things that are unimportant to me. It allowed me to reconnect with something that I thought I had lost forever, because now I was able to access it on a near-daily basis, right in our backyard. 

Swimming was never easy — pushing for a personal best every month, getting through difficult practices, struggling with injury — but it was never harder than the time I had to give it up forever. Okano feels the same, if not more, with gymnastics (don’t try to tell me otherwise, I saw that glint in your eye whenever we entered the forest Okano!) and there is nobody we owe more than the person we were told to kill.

I am where I am today because I have the opportunity to swim for a career now, and with no more concerns about school because I learned all that I needed from a teacher who liked to skip ahead in the curriculum. I have the freedom to do as I like, and the experiences I’ve gained during that year were necessary for me to do them effectively.

So, I guess what I’m saying is: find someone who will genuinely support you as much as they can, because your personal success matters so much more than something as small as money or arbitrary grades. 

And hey, maybe stop by a forest once in a while.

* * *

“Hi everybody!” Kurahashi smiles at the camera. “Today I’m joined by some very special guests. You may know them for their incredible success in their careers and their social medias, but I want to introduce them in a bit of a difference context today — my classmates: Sosuke Sugaya and Sumire Hara!”

**\- Wait, _that’s_ Sosuke Sugaya? God bless**  
**\- Kura-chan, you don’t livestream enough (〃＞＿＜;〃) please make a twitch.**  
**\- first**  
**\- Holy shit I was literally just at Hara-san’s restaurant. The line took _forever_**  
**\- Hello**

“Hey,” Sugaya does a two-fingered salute. “I’m on Instagram and Twitter, so you might know me from the art that I post there. Other than that, I guess I do some freelance.” On-screen, pictures of his tattoo work and commissions appear over his social media handles and email address.

“Hello!” Hara waves. “I have a Youtube channel where I post cooking tutorials whenever I’m free, but I work full-time as a professional chef at _Le Poulpe_ , a restaurant that I own.” The logo of her store appears next to her youtube name, accompanied by pictured of intricate and well-made dishes. 

“And you all know me, I’m Kurahashi, bringing you nature walks and vlogs every Wednesday and Sunday! Feel free to check out my friends’ businesses, because today we’re going to be talking about something very dear and near to our hearts!” Kurahashi holds up an object. “Tadah!!”

“We wrote a book about an event that you all may know about, but don’t _know_ know about,” Hara explains.

**\- damn youtuber books stuck ass**  
**\- hey shut up! we take any content that Kura-chan is willing to give us**  
**\- yeah lol she’s not hurting anyone and this one actually looks kinda interesting**

“I’m sure you’ve all heard about that monster who destroyed the moon, right?” Sugaya chimes in. “I don’t know if it’s ever been officially released who the members of the class were, but that’s us. Twenty-eight students, and we’re all very excited to tell you about _our_ version of the story.”

**\- didn’t that happen like five years ago (LOL)**  
**\- I heard the government was involved in that though? Did yall not sign any NDAs**  
**\- fake**

Sugaya glances at the live chat, skimming the comments as they blink by, “uh, we’ll get to that. It’s gonna be a pretty long stream.”

“There’s… a lot of stuff to cover, so please stick around if you really are curious!” Hara says.

“Aw, Sugaya,” Kurahashi suddenly leans over, “you’re not going to mention that you were the one who designed this lovely cover?” Kurahashi gestures to the book, holding it closer to the camera. It’s a colourful design that borders on abstract, but the silhouette is distinctly octopus-shaped. Droplets in every colour of the rainbow erupts from octopus’ chest, looking like they’re meant to represent a blood splatter after being shot through the heart. Only two distinct lines of matte black are on the cover — an outline of a half-moon smile, and a tie with a marking in the same shape. “It’s very very nice, and we wouldn’t have found a better person to make it!”

“Hahah, thanks,” Sugaya rubs his arms, a nervous tic, “You know how awkward it is for me to listen to compliments. Let’s move on.”

**\- are we surprised? our king is incapable of anything less than perfect**  
**\- hard fax**

Kurahashi playfully punches his shoulder, “Well fine then, but if you’re not interested in the contents at all, which, well, you _should_ be, it’s very interesting, but at the very least you should buy the book for the gorgeous design that’ll definitely look very nice on your bookshelves!”

“Alright, Kurahashi,” Hara smiles. “I think we should get talking about the contents now. I’m sure your viewers are very curious about what the book is about.”

**\- finally the juicy stuff**  
**\- hey!! I was enjoying their conversations. that’s the best part of a Kura-chan livestream y’all appreciate her plsヾ(`ヘ´)ﾉﾞ**  
**\- ok…?**

“Right!” Kurahashi shifts her position on the couch to sit cross-legged. “Well, you already know that we’re making it about that year after the moon was destroyed.”

“Five years ago,” Sugaya nods.

“Woah, has it really been that long already?” Hara shakes her head. “It feels like just yesterday when we were taking those junior high final exams.”

**\- can’t relate lol. forgot abt exams as soon as they finished**  
**\- mood**  
**\- lol I didn’t pick up a newspaper during that time so idk what’s going on**  
**\- bruh how did you avoid that much news this story was legit everywhere**

“Time flies,” Kurahashi agrees. “But anyways, that year was when the monster who supposedly destroyed the moon came over to our tiny classroom in a small shack up on a mountain — ”

“I still can’t believe Principal Asano still hasn’t been arrested,” Sugaya mutters. “Who the hell makes teengagers spend half their day on a secluded mountain?”

“Yeah, I know right?” Kurahashi nods vehemently. “If you want to hear more about him, that is, if you don’t remember him from the news five years ago, it’s all in the book.”

**\- oh shit some tea boutta be spilled**  
**\- damn last I heard he got into the local government? idk dudes**  
**\- wait. yall. do yall think that this book can be used as evidence to finally arrest stinky rat man**  
**\- probably not lol. He’s evaded arrest for like… forever**

“So yeah, the monster — the one who destroyed the moon, not Asano — came to our small run-down classroom, and the government told us that we needed to kill him.” Hara sighs. “Come to think of it, I also think that the government placed waaay too much pressure on some teenagers.”

“Yeah, what were we? Like, 15?” Sugaya snorts. “That’s crazy, sheesh.”

“But it’s a good thing, at least, that Koro-sensei wasn’t actually a bad person.” Kurahashi says. “Otherwise we’d all be deader than rats in a snake pit.”

**\- haha korosensei is such a cute name for a literal monster**  
**\- but if he aint a bad person he shouldn’t get a bad name?**  
**\- yeah but— ok you know what w/e**  
**\- so y’all just gonna ignore the real sketchy government thing goin on here huh?**

“Of course, of course.” Hara says. “That’s why we’re making the memoir, after all. He deserves the true story to be heard.”

“Yeah, so.” Sugaya takes a sip of water. “Basically, a bunch of teens were set to try and kill this superhuman monster, and we were totally shit at it. Like, I mean, we got good and all, but we didn’t really kill him with our own skills, no?”

“Ugh, I can’t believe I’m saying this on video, but you do have to remember that we became better ‘assassins’ than some professionals,” Kurahashi points out. 

**\- q…queen (｡・//ε//・｡)**  
**\- same lol**

“Hahah, thanks,” Kurahashi smiles at the live chat. “But yeah, remember that island? Uh, Okinawa, if I remember right.”

“Not really,” Subway shudders. “I was fighting a fever while the exciting stuff was going down, since I was one of the people infected.”

“Same here,” Hara nods solemnly. “The assassination part was cool… the part after that wasn’t.”

“Oh, haha. I was also infected, but since I have such a weak immune system I passed right out.” Kurahashi pauses to think. “Huh, I hope someone who was awake put their experiences in the book, because I only know whatever they told us.”

“Yeah,” Hara agrees. “Anyways, since that’s a bit heavy, we should move on to that cultural festival. I wrote in the recipe word for word into my chapter.”

“Ooh, I’d love to have some of that stew again,” Kurahashi looks wistful. “Say, Hara, could you start selling that at your restaurant? I’ll stop by a lot more often if you do!”

**\- stew?**  
**\- hey wait a second wasn’t there that news article a while ago about that local cultural festival? u know the real fancy one with the concert and shit**  
**\- damn imagine being that rich**

“Oh, that was probably class A,” Sugaya answers the chat. “That couldn’t be us, since we’re not show-offs,” he gives a lop-sided grin. 

“Yeah! We were the ones with the very yummy stew made from forest mushroom and some other stuff that I don’t remember,” Kurahashi turns to Hara. “You do though!” her eyes are practically sparkling.

“You’re already at my restaurant five times a week,” Hara deadpans.

Kurahashi giggles, “I mean, sure, but that’s good business for you isn’t it?”

“I don’t _need_ — ” Hara cuts herself off with a sigh, but she has an endeared smile on her face. “Fine, yeah. I’ll make like a special promotion or something.”

**\- bless**  
**\- merci kurahashi**  
**\- wait yall I don’t live in japan does this mean i have to fly overseas**  
**\- no. less line-up time for us**

“Well anyways, we’re getting really off track,” Sugaya chuckles. “Rio’s gonna kill us when she finds out that all the promotion we did was just rambling.”

Kurahashi and Hara laugh. 

“Is there anything else we need to talk about?” Kurahashi glances at Hara, who quickly checks her notes. 

“Uh. What’ve covered so far?”

“Dunno,” Sugaya shrugs. “Oh, did we talk about Bitch-sensei and Karasuma at all?”

“Oh, yeah!” Kurahashi turns back to the camera. “They’re also very very important, and they’re very good teachers even though they work for the government.”

**\- lmao is her name actually bitch**  
**\- did y’all actually have govt ppl teaching you that’s so insane omg**  
**\- shit man imagine having a teacher that wouldn’t beat yo ass for calling them a bitch**

“Oh, her name wasn’t _actually_ Bitch-sensei. It’s like… an inside joke? Was that what it was?” Hara turns to around to ask.

“Gues’so,” Sugaya replies. “Honestly I don’t remember too much about that whole class where she got her nickname — I think I might’ve been napping. Seems like typical Karma bullshit though, so it didn’t take long to catch on.”

“Yeah, and oh, I think in most peoples’ sections we just discussed Koro-sensei,” Kurahashi skims through a group chat. “Yeah,” she confirms again. “Sorry Bitch-sensei!! I hope you’re enjoying your now-legal lifestyle with Karasuma-sensei!”

“Alright that’s probably good enough,” Sugaya waves his hand dismissively. “What’s next on the agenda?”

**\- excuse me… what kinda cliffhanger bullshit—**  
**\- y’all imma need ppl to make this book popular enough so they write a sequel on what tf is happening with the govt agent teachers**  
**\- I… are they allowed to talk abt government tho**

“It’s fine!” Kurahashi says with a bright grin on her face, “We could totally destroy the cops if they came after us.”

**\- step on me queen**  
**\- ur gross (love u queen)**  
**\- ur mom gross**  
**\- ???**

“I mean, yeah,” Sugaya says. “But please don’t advertise that. Also, I haven’t gone to the gym in like… five years.”

“Technically none of us went to gym while that assassination year was happening either.” Hara points out. 

“But yeah, I definitely couldn’t swing from trees anymore, unfortunately,” Kurahashi sighs. “Maybe we should get Okano to teach us again.”

“None of us have the time for that,” Hara says, raising an eyebrow. “Unless we get paid another 10 billion yen, then we could probably all go into early retirement.”

“Speaking of,” Sugaya cuts in with a smile, “Ritsu told Rio about our livestream, and now she’s halfway up our asses about this. We gotta get on this dudes.”

**\- Honestly? I’m living for the rambling**  
**\- ye, if that’s what Kura-chan’s chapter is like then please just take my money**

“See?” Hara gestures to the chat, “Ritsu, please tell Rio that our long rambles about whatever is working.”

“She texts back ‘whatever’ but she also added a gif of a grumpy cat so I don’t think she’s that mad,” Sugaya laughs. 

“Good!” Kurahashi says. “But that just reminded me, is anyone writing about that student dude?”

“Huh.” Sugaya says, though it’s less of a statement than it is a question. 

“You know, the guy…” Kurahashi rubs the bridge of her nose. “Ugh, it’s been half a decade, I don’t know his name.”

“Itona?” Hara tries.

“No, it’s that guy in all white, but his student?”

“Itona???”

“No the guy who tries to kill us,”

“That doesn’t narrow it down… like at all.”

“Umm,” Kurahashi’s brows furrow, and she massages her temples. “Oh!” She snaps her fingers, “The Grim Reaper dude! Flower guy!”

“Oh him,” Sugaya says. “Yeah, the guy who locked us up in that cage.”

**\- (⊙_⊙) ?????**  
**\- this shit happened to y’all in JUNIOR HIGH???**  
**\- what kinda YA fantasy ass story is this?? y’all ok though???**  
**\- yo wait I just joined the stream did all this actually go down irl??**  
**\- apparently??**  
**\- x to doubt**

“No you guys!!” Kurahashi laughs. “Check the newspapers, it’s all true!”

“I don’t think any newspapers are left from five years ago.” Sugaya says.

“They have records crosswords from the 1900s, I think they’ll have the earth-threatening incident from five years ago,” Hara teases.

“Wow, I didn’t come here to be bullied.” Sugaya scoffs with mock-offence. 

“You were the least bullied in class,” Kurahashi says, ruffling his hair playfully. “This is just what you get!”

“I wasn’t bullied because I was a part of the ‘background people’ gang,” Sugaya says. “But they kicked me out of the group chat after I got popular on instagram. Apparently they ‘respect my fame but I’m just too protagonist-like now’”

“A what gang?” Hara asks. 

“Fuwa did all this, but you know, Nagisa and Karma were the stars of the show. They were like, the ‘outstanding’ people, and I guess we were the sheeple.” Sugaya says. “Still surprised that Nagisa didn’t become a professional assassin, but whatever. Anyways, anyone who weren’t that close with them started jokingly calling ourselves the ‘background people’ gang — again, all Fuwa’s idea — since we weren’t really involved in that many assassination attempts unless it was a class effort.”

“Rough,” Kurahashi says. “I also got kicked out of the group chat after I got the gold play button.”

“Hey, wait I was never a part of the group chat?” Hara asks.

“It’s because you were almost part of the main supporting cast,” Sugaya says. “Also because everyone teased you a lot.”

“You mean when nobody would shut up about my weight?” Hara’s expression drops.

**\- Yikes**  
**\- they were like 15? People make mistakes?**  
**\- doesn’t change that it was a shitty thing to do tho (눈_눈)**

“Yeah,” Sugaya agrees, referring to the chat. “Sorry Hara, I know we’ve apologized before, but that doesn’t make up for it.”

Hara waves her hand dismissively, “Doesn’t matter anymore. You’ve all grown up, and honestly? Good enough for me. Besides, I’ve aired out all my frustrations in my chapter, so just feel free to check that out.”

“Aw,” Kurahashi gives Hara a hug. “Kayano just sent these over, but as soon as the live-stream is over I’m jumping to your chapter first!”

“Thanks,” Hara pats Kurahashi on her head. There’s a few beats of silence before Hara speaks up again. “Oh yeah, so Sugaya did you want to mention what you wrote in your chapter?”

“I didn’t know what to write, so I put in some stuff about Koro’s teaching methods. Also that time I gave you guys those bomb henna tattoos.” Sugaya says.

“I wrote about the cultural festival!” Kurahashi exclaims. “And also whatever traps that I could remember.”

“Nice.” Hara says.

“So I think we’ve rambled long enough,” Kurahashi says after she reads a ping from her phone. “Ritsu says that we’ve talked enough.”

**\- guys I’m late who’s ritsu**  
**\- they never said**

“She’s like our personal friend and Alexa.” Kurahashi explains. “She’s like a robot but like, a human robot? An android. No, an app? Uhh.”

**\- ???**  
**\- lmao I slept through junior high imagine if your class was that exciting**  
**\- wait wait wait please tell me that your robot friend wrote a chapter**

“She did!” Kurahashi says. “But I’m not spoiling anything, so you’ll have to buy the book to find out about it!” She winks.

“Alright, before we wrap up, does anyone have any questions?” Hara asks.

They answer a few miscellaneous questions, such as the price ($15.00 USD), or the date of publication (two weeks from the livestream date), or whether there will be merch or not (if there are enough pre-orders), and the other famous people that were involved in the class (you’ll see!). 

“So I think that’s everything?” Sugaya asks. 

Kurahashi makes an affirming sound but double-checks her phone just in case. “Yup!” She confirms. “Thanks again for coming on here with me!” 

“No prob,” Sugaya says. He leans in for a brief hug. 

“Anytime,” Hara takes her turn to hug Kurahashi after Sugaya lets go. 

“Well then, hopefully you all will consider supporting us when our book launches! Pre-orders are opening right now, so feel free to do that too if you want to support us or this project!” Kurahashi says.

“Bye!” They all wave as the screen goes black.

* * *

**Group Chat: Fuwa stop changing the gc name >:(**

From: Mimura  
— Have your guys’ phones also been blowing up?  
— I’ve been getting messages non-stop

From: Fuwa  
— well obvsssss  
— its like  
— bitches be mad whatchu gonna do  
— :shrug:

From: Yada  
— we’re not on discord you can’t do that  
— there are actual emojis that you can pull up whenever you want :P

From: Fuwa  
— but thats like…...too much workk

From: Mimura  
— Guys I asked like. One question. We talk about Fuwa’s texting habits at least twice a week.

From: Masayoshi  
— Thats pretty generous..  
— Its at least three times a day  
— And we dont even text that much

From: Fuwa  
— rude

From: Yada  
— yea we just do it mentally  
— dreading our next convo with u :PP

From: Fuwa  
— RUDE (╥﹏╥)

From: Takebayashi  
— I better not come back to see 100+ unread messages again.

From: Isogai  
— I don’t know what you’re expecting from these guys.  
— Also

_Isogai changed the name to **bg gang ayyy**_

From: Mimura  
— Guys I just want to know if Karma also threatened to break down y’all’s doors or not

From: Masayoshi  
— lol “y’all’s”

From: Yada  
— no please don’t add any more aopstrophies  
— *apostrophes 

From: Fuwa  
— lmao

_Mimura changed the name to **Please just answer my question**_

From: Isogai  
— ok geez mimura what  
— too lazy to scroll back up

From: Mimura  
— the BOOK

From: Fuwa  
— oh yea  
— lmao rio got really mad at me

From: Yada  
— oh shit did you put in that time she didnt notice the bug in her sandwich and ate it whole

From: Fuwa  
— I DIDNT HAVE SPACE!!  
— I TOTALLY WOULDVE THOOOO  
— If I wrote any more then I think they would’ve gotten suspicious

From: Takebayashi  
— Wait what did you guys do?

From: Masayoshi  
— we may or may not have…… told funny stories about our classmates in our chapters  
— dwdw they’re all harmless  
— we’re not that mean

From: Takebayashi  
— Wasn’t Rio the one editing?

From: Yada  
— they had a whole team. we sent the rio stories to karma to edit, and we sent the karma stories to rio to edit, and everyone else was fair game

From: Fuwa  
— ☆⌒(ゝ。∂)  
— they HAD NO IDEA what was coming

From: Takabayashi  
— I’m so glad I don’t join in with your guys’ antics. I certainly don’t want to be on the receiving end of Karma or Rio’s wrath.

From: Isogai  
— Haha that’s why I moved to a new neighbourhood

From: Masayoshi  
— they’ll still find you.  
— I hope you know this

From: Isogai  
— I also only put in the fact that Terasaka reads shoujo manga  
— But I’m hiding from them because I’ve associated with you guys :(  
— Horrible influences, all of you

From: Yada  
— haha you’ve only got yourself to blame for not leaving this group chat

From: Isogai  
— You keep inviting me _back_! What am I supposed to do :((

From: Masayoshi  
— haha

From: Yada  
— and speaking of stories I mentioned that time ritsu glitched and spoke in dwayne the rock johnson’s voice for a week

From: Isogai  
— Wait I thought that was because Itona hacked her system? 

From: Yada  
— oh damn  
— did you include that in your chapter?

From: Isogai  
— Um I think I mentioned it

From: Fuwa  
— nice  
— a whole ass narrative inside a narrative  
— mystery-ception  
— even WE didn’t know what was coming

From: Yada  
— yeah it’s almost like multiple perspectives does that lol

From: Fuwa  
— (；⌣̀_⌣́)  
— (눈_눈)

From: Mimura  
— Oh hey sorry I left.

From: Fuwa  
— didn’t even notice lmao

From: Mimura  
— ヽ(￣～￣ )ノ whatever.  
— Anyways I was gone because someone stopped me in the street.

From: Yada  
— oh no are you ok???  
— also why are you out at like, midnight

From: Mimura  
— Snack run.  
— Also it wasn’t anything serious haha, they asked for an autograph.

From: Masayoshi  
— doubt

From: Mimura  
— It was because of the book!  
— They said that they were really happy to see us come forward etc. etc.

From: Isogai  
— Oh woah  
— Neat

From: Fuwa  
— yeah fuck the news  
— we own the public’s attention now  
— and RIGHTFULLY SO (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ

From: Takebayashi  
— Speaking of, were you all aware of our merchandise being sold out? That’s impressive.

From: Yada  
— oh dang  
— neat  
— how much of the paycheck cut are we receiving again

From: Masayoshi  
— I thinnnnnnk it’s evenly split  
— but knowing rio we’re prolly gonna end up scraping her change  
— but also I’ve been able to pay my rent like, three months in advance and actually have emergency savings so like yea I’m happy with this 

From: Fuwa  
— oh hell yeah masa be moving up in the world  
— °˖✧◝(⁰▿⁰)◜✧˖°

From: Masayoshi  
— hell yeah :D

From: Mimura  
— Oh niceeee Masayoshi!!  
— ( ´ ▽ ` )  
— Congratulations!! I’m glad the book worked out well for you.

From: Fuwa  
— wbu guys  
— I was playing on an old ps3 for like ever but I finally upgraded bc of sales

From: Yada  
— oh nice nice  
— I’ve mostly been depositing them into a savings account because idk what to do with the cash lol

From: Masayoshi  
— valid!!

From: Takebayashi  
— I consider that cash all “excess”, so that’s what I use to invest in the stock market.

From: Fuwa  
— damn, as expected of boring busnissnan takebayashi  
— *businessman  
— (also jkjk I’m happy for u do w/e u want w the money (´｡• ω •｡`) ♡ )

From: Takebayashi  
— Yes, that is the plan. Also, I think it’s important to note that I’m not actually making that much money off of these investments because I’m only buying a few shares.

From: Yada  
— phew idk stock

From: Mimura  
— Mood.  
— Also to answer your question I’ve mostly been treating myself to more expensive snacks. I don’t know money lol.

From: Fuwa  
— also mood!!!  
— eat those snax!!!  
— (and also pls send pics of your favs so ik what brands to buys from)  
— *buy

From: Mimura  
— Hahah, if I remember. 

From: Fuwa  
— 。.:☆*:･'(*⌒―⌒*)))

From: Isogai  
— Oh sorry I had to turn off the stove, I’m back now

From: Yada  
— hey

From: Isogai  
— And um, with the paycheck  
— I’ve mostly been gifting them to my siblings? I got lucky enough to get a well-paying job but they’re still struggling with some stuff so  
— You know

From: Fuwa  
— awwww that’s so sweet of you  
— let us know if we can help too!!!!!

From: Mimura  
— Yeah absolutely. I’ve got way more funds than I really should have right now.

From: Isogai  
— Oh no non o  
— You guys don’t need to do that  
— But thank you for the offer! I’m sure my siblings would appreciate it  
— But also they have enough right now hold onto your money for yourselves :D

From: Masayoshi  
— aw

From: Yada  
— isogai someday you’re going to become a whole ass light source  
— you’re so heckin bright

From: Isogai  
— lol

From: Fuwa  
— (っ˘з(˘⌣˘ ) ♡

From: Isogai  
— (//ω//)

From: Takebayashi  
— By the way everyone, as entertaining as you all are, it is 1 A.M. right now.

From: Yada  
— you’re still up

From: Takebayashi  
— Mostly because my phone won’t stop ringing.

From: Mimura  
— Wait does your phone not have a silencing option?

From: Fuwa  
— and you can always mute the chat

From: Takebayashi  
— I’m mostly saying this because you all have work tomorrow. Please get some sleep.

From: Masayoshi  
— aw, he has a heart

From: Takebayashi  
— Now go to sleep. I’m leaving now.

From: Fuwa  
— ok byeeeeeee  
— also gn gn I gotta get up early for an event tmrw

From: Yada  
— goodnight  
— also I’m starting to doze off so I’ll be going too

From: Isogai  
— I just made myself some midnight food so I’ll… be awake a bit longer  
— Goodnight to you guys though!

From: Mimura  
— Well enjoy your food. I might sleep soon, who knows  
— Also, goodnight!

From: Masayoshi  
— sleep well! <3

* * *

####  **Chapter 3**

_Written by: Hazama Kirara (because apparently Itona, Terasaka, Yoshida, and Takuya aren’t trusted to write anything… and for good reason)_

What defines a monster? Is it the barely-tangible creature in a children’s tale meant to frighten them into obedience? Is it those drunk with power and strength, imposing their will onto the weaker civilians who are already struggling just to survive? Or is it as simple as anything we deem to be unknown? Monsters have been prevalent in our society as long as society itself existed — to scare us, to embolden us, to create a new _something_ where there once was nothing. Not only must we ponder the definition of a monster, but the role of a monster as well. Hideous creatures, born out of the deepest fears of the human psyche, creating genres of horror beyond what should ever be recorded in order to disturb the ‘normal’, no, the _complacency_ that we’ve grown accustomed to. And sometimes, such creatures are necessary to pry open our eyes to the injustices of the world.

I myself, along with my dearest friends, have encountered such a ‘monster’. We were taught by him, in fact, for an entire school year while we were too young to even be considered teenagers. He was easily two meters tall, covered with slime that didn’t so much as drip but impose the threat of doing so, and would resemble a sort of octopus is he wasn’t such a saturated mucus-yellow. 

And yet, despite the distinct scent of perspirant mucus and the sickening sound of squelching tentacles, our monster was terrifying, sure, but in all the ways that a _monster_ wasn’t. He was capable of achieving speeds upwards of mach 20, proving his strength and his abilities at every opportunity possible. He was capable of dissolving even the strongest iron with only his saliva, capable of detecting any change in the atmosphere with a sniff of his misshapen nose. He impressed upon us on a near-daily occurrence that he could have us beheaded and disposed of any day he desired, at such high speeds that we wouldn’t even notice our rolling heads until they’re six feet under.

But that’s not why he terrified us.

He terrified Itona because of his kindness. A kindness that made itself evident through his tentacles and the surprising warmth that they emitted. A type of kindness that wasn’t obvious at first, but once it made itself apparent it also became difficult to imagine a life without it. His kindness didn’t show itself in physical affection, save for the occasional head pat. Instead, he would show us kindness when we cried. He would comfort us, or distract us, or cheer us up, depending on what the situation required the most. Our monster would move heaven and earth if it meant that none of needed to shed a single tear ever again, and with his capabilities, we all could believe it. 

He terrified Terasaka because of his sternness. A loving but strict parent that some of us never had. His sternness didn’t manifest in strikes or shouts, but in the kind of active encouragement that would light a fire under our asses and keep us on our feet. His sternness didn’t just come and go with the winds, but instead took over the class by storm. We had to get those grades, and we had to get the kill, and the world was depending on us, a group of idiots and delinquents to save the world. And yet, the one who had the highest expectations of them all cared not for our success, but for the efforts put behind it. 

He terrified Yoshida in his passion. None of us had ever met a teacher with so much love to give, especially not love for his students. Yoshida had been declared hopeless since he was young, rejected for his passions and for his appearances. No teacher ever saw Yoshida as a passionate young child whose interests simply didn’t align with academics, but instead as another unimportant delinquent, meant for nothing more in life than polishing fast food trays. It was our monster, with his odd laugh and even odder habits, who noticed the intelligence that nobody else would bother searching for. It was our monster who used Yoshida’s passion and harnessed to its greatest potential, because nothing made our monster happier than seeing the light of hope on his students’ faces. 

He terrified Takuya with how much he cared. Not favouring one person over the other, not putting anyone’s skills above, or ranking them on a systematic scale that doesn’t work for those intelligent in ways that can’t be measured with numbers. He cared about us all for our own merits. The artistic ones weren’t forgotten because they would rather practice their craft instead of memorizing polymers, but our monster would incorporate their passions into academics instead of tossing them aside. In killing, anything goes; so really, how different could school be?

And finally, he terrified me because of how much we all loved him.

We loved — love — him so, so much. More than we did our studies, more than we did our classmates, and more than most of us love our own families. He’s depicted as a horrible creature on the news, shown across newspapers with that hideous veined grin that only actually appeared whenever he was ferociously mad — not often. That’s the image that the public sees of the teacher who terrified us so deeply with his capacity to love, and who received just as much love in return. We will forever be remembered as victims — not of society, not of a twisted school system, not of our own families — but of a parental figure who created the safest place we’ve ever encountered. The tentacles that we previously viewed as disgusting quickly became a comfort, albeit a sticky, slimy one. His height and extra limbs stopped being intimidating but rather a welcome silhouette, one that we would look forward to every day on that trek up the mountain to our classroom.

Alas, we knew that he had to go; that was our entire mission, after all. And yet, when he took attendance for the final time, before the knife that plunged itself into the heart that loved his killers so much, there was not a single dry eye in the crowd.

We loved him, but we had to kill him. Not because we wanted to, not because it was his wish, and not because the money was a tempting reward. It was simply because our world couldn’t acknowledge that a monster could be kinder to us than any human ever could.

So to Koro-sensei, from all of us, thank you.

**Author's Note:**

> Publishing a book isn’t this easy btw but I thought that 3-E deserves something nice after all the bs they went through lol.
> 
> Hit me up on[Tumblr](https://voicelesswaves.tumblr.com/) to chat about whatever (though I don't really do assclass stuff anymore)...
> 
> Next, huge huge thanks to Kei for the amazing art!! Please go check them out on [Tumblr](https://keiaruu.tumblr.com/) or [DevientArt](https://www.deviantart.com/keihoshi) to support them and their work!  
>  **NOTE:** Kei is planning on making more of their fantastic mini comic strips for other sections of the fic, so feel free to check back soon to see even more of their beautiful pieces! 
> 
> And finally, many thanks to [livixbobbiex](https://archiveofourown.org/users/livixbobbiex) for hosting the AssClass Big Bang! It was fun to revisit this fandom even though I'm mostly over the series, and this event was the perfect chance to do that.
> 
> Thanks for reading this far! Comments and kudos are definitely much appreciated :D


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